From my own understanding Gender based violence (GBV) is not only limited to the abuse of women, men are also at the receiving end. However, a fewer case of GBV against men are reported hence, the stigma and ridicule when one decides to report. What has motivated me to write this piece is a story that I overheard when i was in a commuter omnibus to go home. There was a man who was on a phone call, apparently he had beaten up his wife and the police had summoned him to the station. From his conversations with numerous people they had gotten into an argument things got heated, he lost his temper and he beat her up pretty badly. It was the tone of his voice that made me cringe, he did not seem remorseful and was taking the matter lightly. He believed that because he had apologized, it was enough and she had to accept her fate. Enough said, this made me realize how GBV has now been normalized, to the point that whenever a woman reports to her relatives or friends she is told to pray, forgive and move on. Even when she reports the case she is urged to drop the charges. In the African society there is no room for individuals and couples therapy after such incidents the woman is forced to suck it up and continue with her marriage. Women are discouraged from reporting such matters to the police or elsewhere so as to ‘protect’ their marriage. Gender based violence has several effects which include low self esteem and the “I deserved it” syndrome . There are organizations which empower and raise awareness among women and young girls on Gender Based Violence in different communities. Nevertheless, despite information dissemination, advocacy and lobbying there is still a gap. This issue needs to be addressed from a cultural perspective since that’s where its roots lie. Violence should not be condoned in our society, it erodes our morals and values. It can be passed down to the next generations. No one deserves to be violated in any way, man or woman. There is always an alternative, violence is not the solution.